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Hanging

Posted on: Wednesday, March 28, 2012
Posted at: 12:18 PM

I feel so weird nowdays... It's like, I don't belong.

Friends have left, made new ones. But the feeling just isn't the same.

Well, of course it's not the same. They're not the same few people that I were friends with; they're different. In a good way (:

Everyone's nice to me (: That's a great thing.

However I'm not so sure as to how it will go... hopefully nothing goes wrong.

I realised how lousy I was.

I guess it's me with my low self esteem again.

However, everyone is better than me. In all areas.

Studies, well that's a definite yes.

Skills? Well, they're all wayyyyyyyyy better than me.

But I guess it's gotta do with my laziness all the time.

I don't practise much. Neither do I study much too.

So that's the price to pay huh.

I don't know what's going on with me but I have this empty feeling inside of me.

Maybe it's because I feel that I don't belong? Or what?

It's been growing inside of me.

This uncertainty is gradually leading to fear.

Fear of what? I don't know. I guess that's what I've been trying to figure out.

Or is it that sinking feeling in my stomach when I know I can't achieve my dreams?

My dreams...

It hurts. A lot.

It's so far away from me.

How the hell do I improve?

How am I supposed to step onto the path?

I'm not even there yet. My skills is... quite horrendous.

My voice, isn't all that special and hypnotizing.

I wish I had a great voice for singing.

I love singing. So much.

I can't live without singing.

If someday I ever become mute and deaf, I wonder how the hell am I supposed to survive without singing and listening to music.

I feel like I'm hanging by a thread...

About the Author

Hey there, I'm a 17-year-old rebellious teenager who resides in super sunny Singapore.
I love to sing. It's like the sole purpose I'm born.
Also, I live to eat, not eat to live.
I play the Chinese string instrument called the Erhu (:
My friends often call me "THE CRAZY GIRL" but...
I've figured that I've lost my sanity a long time ago.
初めまして
私はフィオーナです。　よろしくお願いします! ^^

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